Sometimes it's just embarrassing, being Human....

"No, I don't thank you for the fish at all" (notindetroit) 03/20/2014 at 10:02 • Filed to: None

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This is going to be another rant-y post, but for those of you wondering about what this has to do with driving or anything OppoLock/Jalop-related, hang on for a bit please....

I can say this started way back in February when the Broncos !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Yes, it was embarrassing - tremendously embarrassing, one of those things that truly makes you want to hide your head in a paper bag all dayweekyear especially in a town majorly obsessed with its football team (being the one truly good sports team in the whole damn region). There's a lot to be embarrassed about living in Denver, not the least of which is that our local newscasters are, yes, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

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But I'm slowly finding out that Denver isn't alone in its daily output of embarrassment. Really, if I wanted to escape embarrassing situations on a daily basis perhaps booking rocket ship tickets may be my only option. At the very least, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Something got me thinking - I'm never going to escape frustration from these embarrassing frustrations no matter where I am or what I do. I just need to get people to think about what they're doing. Thinking things through helps prevent embarrassment.

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Take the Superbowl for example - yeah, maybe the Donkeys would've still lost but maybe if the line snapper (who, I believe, was actually a third-stringer because the team had been addled by so many injuries) just took a few moments to compose himself he wouldn't have given a freebie two points and changed the momentum of the game after it barely started. Maybe if a few of our "genius" local news media personalities actually bothered to familiarize themselves with how iPads, Instagram and Twitter work they could actually get out a relevant news cast with social media tie-ins instead of constantly making themselves look like near-Luddite buffoons day-in, day-out (believe me, this is hardly the only gaff Good Day Colorado is guilty of, it's just that the vast majority of them only manage to be slightly awkward and cringe-worthy).

So what does this have to do with driving you say? !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , many of the most embarrassing (and fatal) mistakes made on our highways, including what happened in Dallas, are the result of drivers who are woefully mentally unprepared and inattentive when it comes to adapting to new situations or even in perfectly safe, everyday situations. Just today I was stuck behind a clueless driver who was too busy thumbing through her phone and building a long line behind her. It doesn't matter if it's trying to get around an auto accident just bombing down the highway or even !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Being attentive and having full situational awareness is an integral part of driving.

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Attentiveness and knowing what you're doing - being prepared instead of figuring you can wing it every time you have to, even in a professional setting - is what makes life stress and hassle-free not just for you but for everyone around you. Whether it's trying to snap a ball in the biggest game of your life or even working out this newfangled Social Media thing when you're trying to inform a whole city on a tragic event without turning it into a major faux-pas. When you're in your car, it's more than just a social courtesy. But even if your life isn't always on the line, it'd be nice to be able to escape a parking lot without making those around you think that women indeed can't drive.

spanfucker retire bitch > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 03/20/2014 at 10:13

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especially in a town majorly obsessed with its football team (being the one truly good sports team in the whole damn region).

Uhhh, your state is home to one of the most revered NHL teams in hockey history, and they're currently in playoff contention as we speak - just behind Chicago and St. Louis.

yamahog > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 03/20/2014 at 10:18

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I'm sorry, was that last line really necessary? For all the shit women take about being bad drivers, there's a reason our insurance is cheaper. We are over 3 times less likely to be ticketed for driving recklessly or driving drunk, and also less likely to be killed by fatal accidents. The only thing that comes close to evening things out are teen drivers, and I'll take an increase of distracted 'near misses' among young women at slow speeds over the Fast and Furious inspired bullshit killing young men at nearly double the rate of their girlfriends.
http://www.cbsnews.com/news/men-vs-wo…

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > yamahog 03/20/2014 at 10:51

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I'm about 99% sure you misunderstood what point the author was making. He no longer wants those stereotypes..

Forgetful > No, I don't thank you for the fish at all 03/20/2014 at 11:03

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Center, an Offensive Lineman who snaps the ball:

Line-snapper, a Red Snapper on the line:

The Compromiser > spanfucker retire bitch 03/20/2014 at 11:10

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Uhhh, your state is home to one of the most revered NHL teams in hockey history

I Don't believe he lives in Montreal. ;P

The Compromiser > yamahog 03/20/2014 at 11:14

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Distracted Driving here kills more than Drunk Driving so its not the Near Mrs., I'm worried about. Its the ones that don't. And I live in Canada. All we do is drink.

spanfucker retire bitch > The Compromiser 03/20/2014 at 11:33

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I don't believe Montreal is a State.

The Compromiser > spanfucker retire bitch 03/20/2014 at 12:08

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That's not true. Its a nation within a nation according to Canada. And as a nation it can be referred to as a State.

spanfucker retire bitch > The Compromiser 03/20/2014 at 12:10

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You're really stretching here. Regardless, the Avalanche are still a storied team. Oh, and Roy will never win more Stanley Cups with Montreal then he did with the Avs.

The Compromiser > spanfucker retire bitch 03/20/2014 at 13:19

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I don't think the Habs will get another for a long time. Its sad to see it die like that. then again, I live near Toronto, so I'm used to disappointment on the ice. And the Avelanche are a French team anyway. ;P

PS I give up. I'm not into Hockey enough to troll any more....